
| Location | Cardiff South Wales |
| Age | 27 years |
| Cause of Death | Misadventure |
| Date of Birth | 24/07/1969 |
| Date of Death | 07/10/1996 |
| Visitors | 9,550 since 22/03/2007 |
| Creator | |
| Helpers |
*** PLEASE READ ***
A HUGE THANKYOU TO EVERYONE WHO CONTINUES TO LIGHT CANDLES ETC FOR MY PRECIOUS ANGELS. LOVE TO YOU
AND YOUR ANGELS ALWAYS XXX
Mark James Alderman was born on 24-07-69 to Cynthia and Clifford Alderman and passed away on
07-10-96 due to suicide??
Mark left behind two sisters, two brothers, two nieces and two nephews who are broken hearted.
When we remember your smile,
It brightens our day,
And thoughts of your warmth and love,
Seem to smooth the way,
Your gentle spirit is still with us,
Though you are gone,
Sunny days, cool breezes,
Always for you, Mark.
I as his devoted sister will tell his story.
Mark suffered a fit at the age of 8yrs which stopped his breathing for 4mins. At the time our
parents were told that there were no lasting effects from this but time told a different story...
As we grew up Mark seemed to be developing 'normally', we'd play together and fight as siblings so
often do but we were all weary of his outbursts which could often be violent ~ not towards anyone
but towards furniture, toys etc. Mark was under a school phycologist whilst at school and in todays
society he'd be classed as having ADHD. As Mark grew from a child to a teenager his outbursts and
violence grew with him and no-one could control him. When i left home to start my family Mark would
often visit and happily play with my children for hours, he would also help me if needed. Mark and i
had ALWAYS shared a special bond and although his violence frightened me, my love for him remained
and will continue to do so. I saw Mark as an individual and all his problems were part of his
personality. My parents were both disabled and found it extremally difficult to cope with the
outbursts and at times things got so bad that Mark had to be sectioned under the mental health act.
It would sometimes take up to six police officers to take him to hospital and although this broke
our hearts to see him man-handled we knew we were doing the right thing for him. After our parents
died i became Mark's full time carer and believe me it wasn't at all easy. I had four children to
bring up on my own and coping with Mark too i was often exhausted but he was my brother and somehow
i found the strength to cope with it all. I often had to have him sectioned myself because of his
paranoia but i'd visit him most days, on the days i couldn't visit we'd chat several times per day
on the phone.
A couple of weeks before his last hospitalisation he believed people were going to kill him ~ at
times even me !!! I contacted his support workers who came and assessed him, Mark believed that i'd
made them visit so that i could arrange his killing. As you can imagine it was heart wrenching to
hear your own brother, the brother you loved so dearly say such things but i had no choice. It was
confirmed that my beautiful brother was suffering with Paranoid Schizophrenia so he was sectioned
again for his own protection. He had to remain in hospital for the first week under special care
having 10min obs, this meant that he wasn't allowed off the ward (which was locked) without
supervision. I'd have to visit him every day especially at meal times, so that i could taste the
food offered to make sure it wasn't 'poisoned', if i couldn't visit he'd go hungry. On my visits i
noticed a lot of amosity between my brother and one of the care workers, but i put it down to me
caring too much if you know what i mean. Once his medication and sedatives had his condition under
control he was allowed to visit me for short periods of time. I was in the process of arranging for
Mark to come and live with me and was indeed rearranging my home so that he could have a room of his
own without having to share with my son. He was coming home with me on 10th Oct with lots of support
for me to help me cope but due to the Mark's mental health i wasn't allowed to tell him until the
day i went to collect him.
On 7th Oct Mark came to visit me for a couple of hours, he'd brought with him a gorgeous onyx ring
in the shape of a heart, he'd lovingly bought it for my birthday which was the 9th Oct. When it was
time for him to return to the hospital he said he'd seen a car with four men inside, each of these
men had guns and were going to kill him if he went outside. I contacted the hospital who arranged
for a taxi to collect him from here and take him back to the hospital, it is with heavy heart that i
say it was the last time i was to see him alive. In the evening we spoke on the phone and i told him
that i'd be in to see him the next day, he asked me to buy him some pop, crisps and pasties, we then
said we loved eachother and said 'see you tomorrow'.
At 12.30am on the 8th Oct i was woken by a knock at my door, when i opened it i saw two female
nurses from the ward Mark was on and i knew instantly that he was dead. I can remember screaming
'Not my baby bro, please not my baby bro'. :'(
The nurses lead me into the living room and told me that Mark had asked if he could have a bath
shortly after speaking to me. They told me that he had been checked on at 10.10pm and was said to be
in the bath washing and all was well. At 10.20pm when he was checked again he was found dead -
Hanging from the bathroom door frame by his bootlace. I didn't believe this because Mark was in good
spirits when i'd spoken to him and no way would a bootlace hold his weight without snapping. He was
about 5ft 8in and weighed approx 18stone plus the door frame was only 6ft off the floor with an
opening at the top for security purposes. I contacted the police officers that had attended the
death scene, they told me that my brother had not had a bath that night, there was no sign of his
towel or toiletries and the bath was DRY, they also said that he had a ball of dry silver hair in
one of his hands. If Mark had taken a bath as described by a 'male nurse' the bath would have been
WET and where did the hair come from? My brother's hair was ginger !!! I didn't believe that my
brother had committed suicide and although the hospital didn't approve i insisted on a post mortem.
After the PM (at a different hospital) i was asked to identify him which was to take place on my
birthday 9th Oct. My brother Johnny came with me because i felt i couldn't do it alone and after i
confirmed Mark was my brother we were allowed to spend some time with him. This is going to sound
disgusting to most of you but when we were left alone i just had to look at Mark's body, call it
instinct but i had a feeling something wasn't quite right. He had no bruising other than that left
by the PM but i noticed that he had a puncture wound to the inside of his right elbow, this i
thought strange because all his medication had been given orally. I asked the assistant at the
mortuary if any injection had been given for any reason and was told no. I then contacted the
hospital to have a copy of all his medical records sent to me, at first they refused so i contacted
a solicitor who then contacted the hospital on my behalf. I eventually got all his records which
confirmed he had recieved no injection prior to his death and had no way of getting it himself... As
we all know all meds in a hospital are locked away.
My solicitor contacted the coroners office and arranged to have an inquest into Mark's death which
took several months.
In the meantime i arranged his funeral and had a call from the hospital to ask if some of the staff
could attend. I gave permission for the two nurses who came to my home permission to attend but felt
i couldn't trust any of the others until i knew the truth. At Mark's funeral my daughter who was
just 11yrs old wrote a few words to read out in Marks memory, she found it difficult so i tried my
hardest to continue for her but my tears were flowing to readily and i couldn't read the words. The
nurse who i had grown to trust came to our rescue and continued for us. It was a very touching
moment for his family and many friends who had filled the church. Mark's service was beautiful and
going into the church we played 'he aint heavy, he's my brother' and leaving we played 'you'll never
walk alone'. Mark was a great supporter of Liverpool FC so i thought that song would be perfect.
Outside the church a young lady approached me and said the words i'll never forget... I loved Mark
with all my heart and i just wish i had had the guts to tell him how i felt but i was afraid of
rejection. Mark was then cremated and his ashes buried with his mum and dad.
THE INQUEST
I had a barrister fighting my case at the hearing in April 97 and several witnesses were called. One
of the police officers told a different story to the hospital as stated above and the male nurse who
had 'found' my brother had SILVER HAIR, he also had issues with my brother but as i said earlier i
thought i was being the over protective big sister. This so called male nurse had NO QUALIFICATIONS
in mental health care, so even the coroner was surprised that he was in the environment of caring
for sick mental health patients. This nurse claims that he heard Mark washing in the bath and asked
if he was ok, but the evidence of the police says different. He said that Mark had not been given
any injections prior to his death and when asked about the needle mark he said he had no idea as to
why he had this mark. After he had given his 'lying evidence' he practically ran from the court room
with his head bowed, if he had nothing to hide he would have stayed throughout the rest of the
hearing, not run away like the liar he really is.
The judge said that he couldn't decide whether or not Mark was helped in any way to commit suicide,
had no proof where the ball of hair had come from or who gave the injection, so he could only offer
an open verdict.
Mark
I don't know what happened to you that night but i'll never forgive myself for putting you in
hospital and not telling you that you were coming home to stay with me. You were a wonderful person
and would help anyone in need. I'll never forget you my angel and i hope you're happy now that
you're with mum and dad.
Sleep peacfully bro xxxxxxxxx
(◡‿◡✿)
When we are in need of comfort
We walk down memory lane,
There we see you smiling
We talk with you again,
And as we wander slowly back
We seem to hear you say
Don't grieve. don't cry, my family,
We'll meet again some day.
(◡‿◡✿)
GOD CALLED YOUR NAME SO GENTLY
THAT ONLY YOU COULD HEAR
NO ONE HEARD THE FOOTSTEPS
OF A ANGEL DRAWING NEAR
SOFTLY FROM THE SHADOWS
THERE CAME A GENTLE CALL
YOU CLOSED YOUR EYES AND WENT TO SLEEP
AND QUITLY LEFT US ALL
ALWAYS THINKING OF YOU
ALL MY LOVE ANNE xxx
ღ♥ღ♥ღ♥ღ In Peace Go Home ღ♥ღ♥ღ♥ღ
Alan Pemberton
Through veils of peace may you ascend
To promised planes above
Where comfort shall await you
In those summerlands of love.
Although my grief is deep and raw
Although my pain is great
I know that you are still with me
I know that you will wait.
For in God's time we'll meet again
Of this I am quite sure
I loved you so much on this earth
In absence even more.
I am now in Heaven,
The gates have opened wide,
And now I have the privilege
Of walking by His side.
The angel choir is singing
And the music is so sweet;
I'll join them just as soon
As I have worshiped at His feet.
I am now in Heaven,
The blood washed throng is here;
I recognize a lot of them,
There's not a single tear.
There's joy beyond description
And reunions by the score;
There'll be no more separations,
For we'll be here evermore.
I am now in Heaven,
Please wipe away your tears;
I've fought the battle, run the race,
And I'm rid of all my fears.
There is no pain or sorrow here,
The heartaches now are past;
I've read and sung of Heaven,
And now I'm here at last!
I am now in Heaven,
And oh, this place is grand!
No one could have ever told me
Of all the beauty in this land.
Since I cannot describe it,
You'll have to come and see
That it was worth the many trials
To live here for all eternity!
~ Author Unknown ~
♥ I asked God for a flower, He gave me a garden.
♥ I asked God for a tree, He gave me a forest.
♥ I asked God for a river, He gave me an ocean.
♥ I asked God for the world, He gave me you.
♥ My heart is lost to you, always and forever.
┊ ┊ ┊ ┊
┊ ┊ ┊ ☆
☆
┊ ┊
┊ ☆
☆
Im giving you this message & it’s sent from god above
He says that he is with you & he’s sending you his love.
Im to tell you that your loved one is not that far away
He’s waiting up in heaven where you’ll unite again one day.
Do not stop the tears you cry for there sent from god above.
They are not a sign of weakness, but a representation of your love.
Each tear is filled with memories of a time that you both shared
So when a tear runs down your face, gods reminding you they’re there.
That’s why at night when your alone & you toss & turn to sleep
That the pain inside overwhelms your heart & it cuts so hard & deep.
If you stop & look inside your heart, it’s not the pain you bear,
It’s all the good times god let you have & allowed you all to share.
Death is a graduation of life on earth & the memories are the tears.
Each tear represents a moment in time that will last throughout the years.
Now close your eyes & be at peace & know you’ll meet again.
God love’s you so , He wont let go & his grace will never end.
❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿
_____*hug*___*hug*__ __*h ug*___*hug*____
___*hug*______*hug*_ *hug*_______*hug*__
__*hug*__________*hug*__________*hug*__
__*hug*________________________*hug*___
___*hug*_________ _A__________*hug*____
____*hug________SPECIAL_____*hug*_____
______*hug*______ANGEL____*hug*_______
________*hug*_______ _____*hug*_________
__________*hug*_____ ___*hug*___________
____________*hug*__ __*hug*_____________
______________*hug*_ *hug*______________
_________________*hug*________________
❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿
☆•☆ A MESSAGE FROM YOUR ANGEL ☆•☆
♥ I'd Rather See You Smiling ♥
( Alan Pemberton)
You must not think that I have gone
Please don't grieve or pine
I'd rather see you smiling
Laughing - working - looking fine
Death is an exciting key
Which opens many doors
It leads us into other worlds
Quite similar to yours
Life is not an accident
Death is not the end
God designed a mystery
Life and death do blend
So do not think that I have gone
Please don't brood or pine
I'd rather see you smiling
Laughing - working - looking fine
☆•☆ A TENDER REPLY ☆•☆
♥ I Promise ♥
(Author Unknown)
I promise I won't cry forever
But I need to just today.
I promise I will remember
How to live and how to play.
I promise that I'll dry my tears
When the heartache goes away.
I promise that it won't take years
But I need another day.
I promise that I'll live my life
As you would want me to.
I promise when I'm facing strife
I'll face it straight and true.
I promise I will endeavour
To do the best I can each day.
I promise I won't cry forever
But I need to just today.
✰*✰✰*✰✰*✰*✰✰*✰ I Am Lighting This Candle That Shines So Bright And Wishing You Sweet Dreams Tonight. ✰*✰✰*✰✰*✰*✰✰*✰✰*✰✰*✰✰*✰*✰✰*✰
.............)............
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..........( """"_ )........
...........)/(/( \|...,'...
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..____|__|____.....
..(________.....___)...
★ ◦˚◦ ☆ ◦˚◦ ★◦˚◦ ☆ ◦˚◦ ★all my loveMARGO XXX
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
The years will fall like autumn leaves upon his memory.
The touch of Time will ease the heartache, gently, tenderly...
It cannot always be like this; the agony will cease.
And I, resigned, shall find at last - my healing and my peace.
There comes a time when grief must end and sorrow pass away.
Never will he be forgotten - but there'll come a day -
when I shall remember him without a stab of pain -
happy in the secret knowledge that we'll meet again.
(Patience Strong)
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥


























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